disfunctional relationship

I have a crazy, crazy relationship with my crochet hook. It comes and goes as it pleases, with absolutely no regard for my feelings or needs. For example: when I was doing seasonal work at Barnes and Noble, it came to work with me in my pocket. The next day, I was restacking holiday cards, and I found that little trickster hook hiding between the boxes of cards! It had escaped for an entire day, and showed up in an area of the store I never frequented!

I have tried to break it off with this crochet hook. More than once I have decided I won't wait around for it to reappear anymore, and I have replaced it. Strange and mysterious things happen to the replacements. The pink plastic replacement suffered a devastating injury, in which it was broken in half. The gold replacement, while safe in my knitting bag, was tossed out and left behind. I am certain that foul play is involved.

And now, I am in great need of a crochet hook, and the little trickster has gone off again. Last I saw it was in my pocket with the fiery socks a week ago. And I was monitoring it, so I know it made it home from the bookstore. But where it's run off to after that, I cannot say. Dastardly thing! I'm right where I need to crochet the top border of this crazy purse I'm trying to make!

If it doesn't show up by tomorrow, I will be buying YET ANOTHER crochet hook. I shall have to take drastic measures to protect it.